Thank God I'm Here

"Plastic Baby Jesus in a Parking Lot"

oil on canvas

16" x 20"

Here we are.  

It's Saturday here in Bloomfield, Indiana, around 10:30 am.  It's Sunday in the Solomon Islands.  If I was in Honiara right now, I'd be a day older.  But a non-existent non-stop flight would put me there at 4 am on Sunday here...that's 16 hours on a plane to be the same age half way across the world, 4 hours late to being a day older.  Bummer.  But, another 16 hour non-stop flight returning to Indiana would add around 24 hours to my Sunday from Honiara and effectively take me back to yesterday upon landing...Sunday here, Monday there, back to my original age, just 32 hours later.  

Where are you?  How did you get there?  How did we get here?  Are you spending your days chasing time or counting the minutes until time catches up to you?

While you're figuring it out, let me just say....

I am here.  It's raining outside.  I hope you're happy. 

"Blind Girl Petting a Blind Dog"

oil on canvas

20" x 20"

Pass the Antacids

"Love Regan"

oil on canvas

30" x 30"

Sports Illustrated can make you an athlete, Cosmopolitan can make you a model, and Plein Air Magazine can make you a plein air painter.  The perk to the latter...they allow you to advertise your progress for $3995 a page.  How-to articles and artistic confirmation all in the same place...can you beat it?    

I'm thinking of trying one of those food challenges at a restaurant with an attached gift shop.  You know...the kind where you're given an hour to consume a 5 lb. steak, two sides, a dinner roll, and a shrimp cocktail in front of an audience of fellow carnivores.  If you want to win your name on the wall as testament to your great achievements of gluttony, all you have to do is pay $100, consume every bit of fat and gristle, and not throw up in your plate.  And if you lose?  Well, I'd imagine it's the exact same indigestion...minus your grease-smudged, misspelled name on a cheap brass plaque over the booth opposite the bathrooms.

I've done the research...with few exceptions, if you buy a Picasso at Sotheby's for 1 million today, you should be able to sell it at Sotheby's in five years for about 1.5 million.  That sum, in $100 bills, weighs around 33 pounds...the equivalent weight of a little more than six $100 steaks.  That weight of money is also enough to to purchase 15,000 of those 5 lb. steaks...if you're keeping track...

I guess it's all in how you measure.

Pass on the paint.  Sign the subscription.  Pass the antacids.

"Bloomfield, Indiana, October 2016"

oil on canvas

12" x 12"

"What It Means"

He was running down the street

When they shot him in his tracks

About the only thing agreed upon

Is he ain't coming back

There won't be any trial

So the air it won't be cleared

There's just two sides calling names

Out of anger out of fear

If you say it wasn't racial

When they shot him in his tracks

Well I guess that means that you ain't black

It means that you ain't black

I mean Barack Obama won

And you can choose where to eat

But you don't see too many white kids

Lying bleeding on the street

In some town in Missouri

But it could be anywhere

It could be right here on Ruth Street

In fact it's happened here

And it happened where you're sitting

Wherever that might be

And it happened last weekend

And it will happen again next week

And when they turned him over

They were surprised there was no gun

I mean he must have done something

Or else why would he have run

And they'll spin it for the anchors

On the television screen

So we can shrug and let it happen

Without asking what it means

What it means?

What it means?

Then I guess there was protesting

And some looting in some stores

And someone was reminded that

They ain't called colored folks no more

I mean we try to be politically

Correct when we call names

But what's the point of post-racial

When old prejudice remains?

And that guy who killed that kid

Down in Florida standing ground

Is free to beat up on his girlfriend

And wave his brand new gun around

While some kid is dead and buried

And laying in the ground

With a pocket full of skittles

What it means?

What it means?

Astrophysics at our fingertips

And we're standing at the summit

And some man with a joystick

Lands a rocket on a comet

We're living in an age

Where limitations are forgotten

The outer edges move and dazzle us

But the core is something rotten

And we're standing on the precipice

Of prejudice and fear

We trust science just as long

As it tells us what we want to hear

We want our truths all fair and balanced

As long as our notions lie within it

There's no sunlight in our ass'

And our heads are stuck up in it

And our heroes may be rapists

Who watch us while we dream

But don't look to me for answers

Cuz I don't know what it means

What it means?

What it means?

-Patterson Hood

Thanks

Thank you.

Last night's opening reception was a lot of fun.  I couldn't have done it without you.  

See you soon.

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2 Days Until Nighttime

"Bloomington, Looking East"

oil on canvas

12" x 24"

Blah blah blah, yada yada yada...

My solo exhibit, "Nocturne", opens this Friday, May 5 at the I Fell Building in Bloomington.  Corner of 4th and Rogers, 6-9pm.  

51

"3 Yard"

oil on canvas

11" x 14"

You guessed it...

I'm going to say something about my upcoming solo show at the I Fell Building in Bloomington, Indiana.  You know the details by now....it opens at 6pm this Friday, Cinco de Mayo.  The opening reception should be one heck of a good time, so be there...that is, if you're into this sort of thing.  Where's it the I Fell?  Rogers and 4th!  Follow the lights, the sounds, and the smell of tequila.

I'll be hanging the show on Thursday.  I've got 51 paintings making the short trip to Bloomington.  I just hope there's enough wall for all of this paint.

No es una Carrera...

es un...

"Marathon"

oil on canvas

20" x 24"

This Friday is Cinco de Mayo!  I know a lot of people are going to be looking for some Mexico-related fun that evening, so why not mix up a margarita, put on a sombrero, y corre lo más rápido posible como un gato salvaje a...

My newest solo exhibition, "Nocturne", at the I Fell Building in Bloomington, Indiana.  The opening reception starts at 6pm.  See you then amigos.